If you’ve ever been pregnant, chances are you’ve been left confused and offended by insensitive, scratch your head, what on earth comments; I know I have.
Since there are more than enough wonderful things to discuss with an expectant mother, let’s focus on a few common conversation pitfalls and how to work around them.
1. “Wow, you’re huge!” or any variation of that statement relating to the hugeness of anything (at all). You can trust that no one is more aware or sensitive to their size than an expectant mother. She lives in her body daily and knows all too well of the changes that are occurring. Choose to offer a compliment such as, “Wow, you look adorable/glowing/anything but huge.”
2. “You’re way too small, are you sure you’re that far along?” See here’s the thing, of all the times in a woman’s life she would like to be called small, pregnancy isn’t really one of them. Every woman carries pregnancy differently so there’s no need to sound off unnecessary alarms. Again, a better option would be, “Wow, you look adorable/glowing/anything but way too small.”
3. Discussions involving miscarriage or infant loss; this is a supreme no-no. Everyone has been touched by loss of this nature to some degree, pregnant women included. Pregnancy involves enough anxiety so let’s just consider the topic of loss to be like Fight Club, we don’t talk about it. Choose instead to talk about baby joy, there’s more than enough conversation there to keep everyone smiling!
4. Labor horror stories. Remind me again why hashing out labor horror stories is a good idea? Oh that’s right, it’s not. Unless specifically asked, it’s safe to assume that the expectant mother doesn’t want to hear about your 72 hour labor or emergency cesarean section. Consider your audience when following this conversation path. A better topic of conversation would include the mother’s birth plan or birthing facility.
5. Anything reminiscent of “The party’s over.” Statements such as these suggest that children steal all the joy out of life upon their arrival. While life as a parent indeed takes a radial turn, the party is far from over. If anything, the party just got a whole lot more interesting so choose to talk about the excitement instead! Discuss all the wonderful tender moments life as a parent brings!
Pregnancy is a wondrous time filled with joy and eager anticipation. Let’s offer our expectant mothers the support and encouragement they deserve as they embark on life’s most blessed journey!