I believe all of us arrive at a crossroads in life and business at some point or the other in life; sometimes more than once. I have been there myself, so I know this is a time that can be both crucial and confusing. Usually how it arrives is that it follows a major event; perhaps an ending of a close personal relationship or maybe you got laid off unexpectedly. Sometimes you could still be in that job or relationship but you know it’s time for a change.
Regardless of how you get there, this time is not the most comfortable for most. If you find yourself in this spot right now or have been at some point or another, you should know –
a)Crossroads represent an ending – An ending of what is familiar – your past in terms of your relationship, your career, be it your job or business. On a more profound level, this is a time of transition where it’s time to bid good-bye to the old.
b)Crossroads brings mixed emotions which adds to confusion – Hurt, anger, disappointment, anxiety, stress – these feelings often accompany a transition and can complicate things and create confusion
c)Crossroads pushes you out of your comfort zone – And we all know that can be uncomfortable for most. Change is not easy. It’s also a time to make decisions, forced or otherwise and often means stepping into the unknown; that can be both confusing and scary. What decisions to make, will they be right, how to do them, what will happen ‘” can be extremely nerve wracking
No matter what kind of transition one maybe going through, personally or professionally, it is not easy to deal with are not easy to deal. And generally the tendency is to hold on to the past, whether its way of thinking, viewpoints, people or situations.
So how can one deal with this time better and most effectively?
This is your Opportunity – One way to look at this is as an opportunity, an opportunity to re-define things. It could also be a second chance for some, like a do-over of sorts. Consider the unknown future like a blank slate, you can write and shape things just as you would like. Just to take an example – if you are without work at this time, look back at your previous job – did it make you happy? was it something that you were really passionate about? were you pursuing your dreams? If not, use this as an opportunity to explore your options, your passion, likes, dislikes; perhaps you always wanted to be something but never got to pursue it. This will be your chance; a second act. When you look ahead and view things in this way, it will allow you to take your power back and come from a place of strength.
Time to Let Go – Human being are creatures of habit and often because of that we tend to cling onto things, whether they are good for us or not. For example if you were in an unhealthy relationship or wrong career, there are many who stay because they are afraid of stepping out. Look back at your past – Were you in any such situation that wasn’t in your benefit? Clinging onto the past will not serve you well, but learning from it and taking with you what you can, will. You can use that knowledge and wisdom to apply to future situations, so you can create happier life.
Assess your Present – Another thing if you look closely is that so many of us either live in the past or in the future but not so much in the present. But you know you are not the same person you were 10 years ago, you have grown as a person, your outlook on life, your aspirations and so on may not be the same as they were in the past. This is a time to assess and take note off – Who you are today? It’s time to connect with you.
Change is often good – Contrary to what many think that change is bad, I have found it actually to be often a good thing. Having been through lots of them myself and making life altering decisions, one thing that I have learnt is that there is a lot of personal growth and character strengthening that happens during this time. Your values, beliefs and your metal so to speak, gets tested and once you courageously deal with it, you come out a winner in the end. Decisions one makes during this time can often propel you in a direction you could have never previously imagined and can bring your closer to your potential.