Anger is a feeling that all children experience. It is a part of life. All children will experience anger in one way or another and they will learn how to cope with it: sometimes constructively and sometimes aggressively.
It is not easy to teach children on how to deal with their anger constructively, especially if they have already practiced violent ways in dealing with their disappointments, irritations and frustrations. It is very important that we should be there to guide them and be an example for them. So here are a few tips that you could do in order to help your child deal with anger constructively.
According to research, it takes 21 days to form a habit. So I suggest that you choose skills that would make your child more successful and give emphasis to the same skills every day for at least 21 days. So here are a few tips that you could do in order to help your child deal with anger constructively.
Leave and calm down.
Anger is very contagious. If you’re not careful, you will find that your child’s anger would also fuel angry emotions in you that you never recognized were in you. It’s always best not to make decisions when we’re not calm and if we’re not in total control of ourselves.
Here’s an example:
If your child is angry or upset about something and wants a speedy solution to it, you could say, “I need a Break. How about talking about this later?” And then leave calmly and talk about the problem if everybody is already calm.
Be an example.
The greatest method to teach kids is by showing them through your example. Using those frustrating experiences would serve as instant lessons to your child.
Here’s an example:
Assuming you’re in a restaurant and you’ve waited for about an hour and still your orders were not yet served. You’re angry, and sitting next to you is your child now observing you carefully. Be sure to be totally calm and use it as an instant anger management lesson for your child. You could tell your child calmly that you are very angry but be sure to offer a “calm-down” solution after that like telling your child “I’d better go the comfort room first and try to calm myself so I can get back in control.” Your child will certainly follow your example.
Teach your child of “calm-down” techniques
There are number of ways to help kids calm down when they get angry. Unfortunately, many of them have never been given the chance to think of those other options. The only thing they know is expressing their anger in more aggressive ways that’s why they keep getting into many troubles.
It’s best to teach your child with more acceptable behaviors in expressing their anger.
Here are a few examples: leave, exit from an aggressive conversation, walk away, go to a peaceful place, walk, run a lap, listen to music, watch a movie, shoot baskets, draw, talk to someone about it, or sing.
Teach anger control techniques.
One of the very effective strategies for helping kids to calm down is the “breathe in, breathe out” technique. You could tell your child that as soon as he or she is losing control, he or she could do two things. First, take 3 deep slow breaths then count slowly to ten inside your head. It greatly helps children to calm down.