Funny Quotes from Gulliver’s Travels

Gulliver’s Travels is a funny family film starring Jack Black as Gulliver. It was written by Joe Stillman and Nicholas Stoller.

Movie Quotes on Advice

(These two Gulliver Travels quotes come from an exchange where Jack Black is giving Jason Segel advice on making a move on the girl he likes.)

Jack Black as Gulliver: I’ve never told you before but I’m really into you — But I’m into a lot of things so don’t get too excited. I’ve got a lot of things going on — I’d like you to be one of them.
Jason Segel as Horatio: Well, hello there, Slim. I’d ought to call you potomus because you’ve got no hips.

Movie Quotes on Love

(These Gulliver’s Travels quotes are from a scene between Emily Blunt and Chris O’Dowd.)

Emily Blunt as Princess Mary: We are not in love. What do you love about me? Name one thing.
Chris O’Dowd as Edward: (Points toward her breasts)
Princess Mary: Inappropriate Edward.
Edward: (thinking)
Princess Mary: Reach for it —
Edward: One second.
Princess Mary: Okay, take your time.
Edward: I find you — absolutely — satisfactory.

Princess Mary: Now you’re being cruel. And melodramatic. And acting like a complete baby.
Edward: You are acting like a little princess!
Princess Mary: I am a princess!
Edward: Maybe you should act like a princess.

Movie Quotes on Options

(These Gulliver’s Travels quotes come from a scene where Jason Segel is playing hard to get with Emily Blunt)

Horatio: I’ve got to keep my options open.
Princess Mary: Do you?!
Horatio: That’s what I’ve been told.
Princess Mary: Well, I’m not an option. I’m a lady!

Movie Quotes on Forsooking

(These Gulliver’s Travels quotes come from a scene where Chris O’Dowd has teamed up with enemy to battle Jack Black.)

Billy Connolly as King: How dare you forsake your Lilliput brotherens.
Edward: I only forsook that where I was forsooken.
Gulliver: The forsooking ends now.

Movie Quotes on Surrendering

(These funny lines reflect Jack Black’s lying in the film)

Gulliver: I surrender!
Princess Mary: You cannot surrender, you are our most glorious protector!
King: You’re President the Awesome.
Princess Mary: You and Captain Sparrow defeated the Joker in (Magneto?).
Horatio: And you and Jack Bauer had only 24 hours to do it.

Movie Quote on War

(The following line is a changed lyric from a popular song)

Gulliver: War. What is it good for?
Princess Mary: Absolutely naught.