I went to a Latin club dance party in the city a few nights back. Early on in the evening I was asked to dance by a good looking young guy. He had no idea how to do the steps but that never stops anyone from enjoying the music so we had some fun. He came back a bit later asking me to teach him the steps which I knew would be hopeless. Why? Because even from the beginning of the night he and his friends were absolutely smashed drunk. They appeared to be the only heavy drinkers I could see in this large dancing crowd and the more they drank, the less funny their jokes became to anyone else, so they became isolated.
I did say to him at one point – though I doubt he’ll remember – Do you realise that you, and all your friends, would be so much more attractive if you were sober?
This question brought back to me the memory of a party I did as an entertainer some 20 years ago. It was a party for young Christians, an alcohol free one, and I was hired with a group of actors to make light of the fact that we were there to frisk all the guests as they arrived and confiscate any alcohol before they entered the room.
“Oh great,” we all said to each other “this is going to be the most boring party ever. Poor dudes. How much are we going to find hidden?”
But, two things came to me that night which blew me away. First of all, we found no alcohol even though we searched like crazy. Secondly, once we’d finished and all guests were in, some mere 40 minutes into the beginning of the event, we looked into the main room and found the party absolutely rocking. I mean rocking like the best party you’ve ever attended. Could these people really be having fun without alcohol? It had never occurred to me before.
So you see, I’ve been pondering this question for many years. It really got me thinking now, what is the purpose of drinking?
Let’s look at the basics…
To forget our worries
To get happy
To build our confidence
We’re using it to dull our worries, fears and doubts.
So here’s the big question. What if you could be relaxed, happy and confident most of the time? Would you still drink heavily? I put this question to quite a few people over the last few days and it seemed to really stump them.
“Is that possible?” was usually the reply.
“Absolutely” is my answer. It’s all in the mind.
It’s all in our thoughts. We choose our thoughts and we have the power to change them. Try and catch how many times a day and night you find yourself worrying, being fearful over what might happen or doubting yourself. Then ask, is there another way to look at this topic? Can I flip my thoughts to what is possible instead? Do I need to think about it at all right now? If not, what would be a happier topic to think about? (This can be particularly useful when you’re awake in the middle of the night. Don’t try to make yourself NOT think about a topic. Simply change the subject.)
So back to the party. If we went there with the intention of enjoying the music, meeting lots of great people (instead of that one special one), laughing, dancing, singing and having fun, the need to get drunk becomes redundant. It’s a habit we no longer need.
And what are the advantages of that?
It’s better on our body
Our mind is clear so we make better decisions about what we do, say and how we behave
We make better decisions about who we pick up
We save a lot of money
We’re ready to party every day after some food and sleep
Can you think of any disadvantages? I can’t.
I still drink alcohol myself, but I do it to enjoy the taste and that’s a completely different way to drink. Try it and see what you think. If you struggle with getting rid of those fears and worries, or about getting brave enough, then a good Life Coach can help.
Enjoy your party to the max!
“Leave your troubles outside.
So life is disappointing? Forget it!
In here, life is beautiful, ze girls are beautiful,
even ze orchestra is beautiful.”
– Emcee from Cabaret
Business and Life coach
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