Abuse and abusive relationships were not in God’s plan when he created woman for man. His plan was for love to flourish, abide and overtake their relationship. But it has entered into many marriages and comes in many forms, such as physical, mental, and verbal abuse, which result in hurt, pain, wounds and anguish of soul. They are also forms of control and bondage. God made woman for man to help and be a mate for him, not a punching bag. In Genesis 2:18, God said, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Throughout God’s perfect creation there was not a helper found suitable for man. So, the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. And while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and they will become one flesh (Genesis 2:20-24).

Women are a part of man, so why are men abusive toward women? Why do men strike out in anger and hurt the one that God gave them? There are many reasons, some of which may be considered to be deep and spiritual. However, the obvious reasons are simple. Hurt people, hurt people and abused people, abuse people. People who have been victims often victimize. Those who have been rejected, hurt and wounded react to others out of their wounds. They may not intend to or want to, but they are overcome by their hurt, pain and wounds. Many wounds are deep-rooted from childhood and have been hidden under the person’s personality, smile and charm. It is possible that the person has experienced rejection, physical abuse or some other horrible, cruel act against them and is now the underlying reason for their abusive acts.

Rejection and insecurity are two major areas that cause reactions such as anger, rage, jealously, control, strife, contention, bitterness, accusation and unforgiveness. Actually, these are spirits – demonic spirits that have attached to the person through hurt, pain and victimization. There is only one sure way of being free for the abused and the abuser. Jesus Christ is the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6). Jesus is able to heal all wounds and restore all hurt, harm and damage. Jesus is our deliverer, and he will deliver us when we put our trust in him. Jesus shed his blood that we may be free of every yoke and bondage.

When we look at abuse and its tentacles, such as rage and anger as spiritual, instead of natural and deal with them as such, many people and marriages will be saved and delivered. Every tentacle is a demonic stronghold on the lives of the abuser and the abused. Covering these situations with the blood of Jesus is the only true way of deliverance.

When a man finds a wife, he finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord (Proverb 18:22) . When God created woman and gave her to man, he intended for man to care for and love her. In Ephesians 5:25, God tells the husband man to love his wife, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Verse 28 says husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church. It is time for the abused and the abuser to be set free. Husbands love your wives and wives, respect your husbands (Ephesians 5:33) . The Holy Bible, Genesis 2:18, 20-24, Proverb 18:22, John 14:6, Ephesians 5:25, 28, 33