Romance has always been an underlying theme in the gaming world – rescue the princess and get the girl – but video game romances don’t always work out for the better – as these five doomed gaming relationships prove.
Mr. and Mrs. Pac-Man
I never understood how the whole “Pac-Man/Mrs. Pac-Man” thing came about. Pac-Man spends all of his time popping pills, chasing ghosts, binge eating, and hanging out in dark corners, but somehow managed to have a wife and son. It’s only a matter of time before Mrs. Pac-Man gets tired of Pac-Man’s antics and opts for a little “Blinky, Inky, Pinky, and Clyde” on the side – if you know what I mean.
Mario and Princess Toadstool
Mario is the most popular video game protagonist ever and he pretty much lives to rescue Princess Toadstool, but their entire relationship is based on some sort of damsel in distress fantasy. If things were to really work out and Bowser ever ceased pursuing the Princess, she’d drop Mario like a bad habit – dude, Mario digs in toilettes for a living and the Princess lives in castles and runs nations… not gonna happen.
Cloud Strife and Aeris
Cloud and Aeris, of Final Fantasy VII fame, always had some sort of odd romance where it was hardly ever expressed, but always felt by fans. A relationship built on shaky ground will never work out and seeing how Cloud is totally into Aeris because she reminds him of his mother and Aeris is into Cloud because he reminds her of her dead first love, they’ll either never make it as a couple or spent tons of gil on marriage counseling.
Link and Zelda
Link has been pursuing Zelda for years but the only action between them is the action-packed adventures Link goes on trying to save her butt. Let’s face it, Link is short, a menace [vase busting trespasser], and he has zero to no chance with an elf princess vixen like Zelda.
Master Chief and Cortana
Fans have always expected that Halo’s Master Chief and Cortana had a thing going on between them seeing how they are basically the best of friends and Cortana is basically in MC’s head 24/7. During his epic battles, MC has pretty much been alone on the battle field with only Cortana to talk with and its very likely that they’ve had a thing for each other, but MC and Cortana could never be for obvious reasons – Cortana is an AI program.
For more, read 10 Video Games We Keep Buying, but Haven’t Changed in Eons , 5 Most Pointless Wii Games Based on a Single Gimmick , and 5 Video Game Movies that Are as Kick-Ass as the Games They’re Made From
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