This is a topic that has come up a time or two during a few ladies nights across the board. During the really deep conversations that usually start and end with (what else) men. Why is it that when you think things are going ever so right it turns out to be oh so wrong? You think that you and the guy you’re dating are really feeling one another but come to find out he really wasn’t feeling you at all. If you’ve got a good vibe going on with you’re guy and you want to keep it that way, don’t get wrapped up in the mistakes women often make when they first start dating. Here are four of them.
We become too available
You’re significant other knows that you have a life. It’s what attracted him to you in the first place but sometimes we often push our own interest to the back because we want to invest most of our time in the person we’re with. So we fill up our emotional bank with deposits of affection while that project or dream we were working on sits idly by. What happens when the relationship goes sour is that we end up feeling used and emotionally bankrupt. It’s important to find a way to balance doing the things you love so that you don’t end up losing valuable pieces of yourself in the aftermath. Even though you probably want to, you don’t have to be available to answer his ever beck and call. Do You.
We have unrealistic expectations
Sometimes the relationship you thought you were trying to build goes completely dry and we have no idea as to why. It starts by him not calling as often as he did. You don’t spend as much time together as you used to. He picks arguments for no apparent reason. He starts seeing other people. What happened? This is the man that you thought would be you’re match.
Sometimes we set unrealistic expectations on the role our guy should fill in our lives and when he begins to fall short of being the man we wanted we tend to end up hurt. Just because you may be ready to move to the next step in your relationship doesn’t mean that he’s ready too.
We carry too much baggage
Sometimes one bad apple can really spoil the bunch. If we don’t allow ourselves time to heal from the pain caused by a bad relationship, we can end up dragging unresolved issues to the next man. Then when he doesn’t meet our needs we end up casting good men into the same pile as those rotten apples we should have been tossed away. Serial daters are known for this.
We give it up too fast
Grown men and women are free to do whatever they want but there has to come a time when what you want and what you do align themselves. If all you want is someone to get hot and heavy over, then by all means that’s all you’ll get. But if what you want is a long lasting relationship, why give him a piece of you that he hasn’t even earned the rights to yet. All too often women give it up so fast that they hardly give themselves time to get to know the man they’re dating. Patience really is a virtue and if he wants to build a relationship with you he’ll accept that.