Ever wonder why your date won’t go out with you again? Well it could be because you broke one or two dating codes for what not to do when dating. To help learn the 12 tips for what not to do when dating, I have interviewed therapist Jenny Grace Shaw, M.ED, CPT, CWS.
Tell me a little bit about yourself.
“I am a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in the state of Hawaii. I enjoy therapeutic work with individuals, couples, families, and groups from multiple cultural, ethnic, religious, and economic backgrounds. Though take my healing work seriously, I never forget to “not” take myself too seriously. Humor and humility are my closest friends.”
What are 12 tips for what not to do when dating?
“There comes a time when we need to acknowledge what NOT to do on a date. As a therapist, but mostly as a woman, I still find myself amazed to the point of embarrassment for those who make the following mistakes.
1. Just as we are asked to not text while driving, NO TEXTING while dating.
2. When planning to go out on a date, make sure you have money, especially if you were the one who initiated.
3. If you have a suspended drivers license, don’t attempt to drive.
4. Though some may really like threesomes, it is really not kosher to bring someone along especially if it’s the person you would actually rather be dating.
5. When on an overnight date, don’t leave them at the airport and then call them later to ask if they could pick you up since you locked your keys in the car.
6. When getting over an ex-girl(boy)friend, don’t make your date wait in the car or at the table while you talk to your ex on the phone or go in their house to see ‘if they are alright.’
7. Don’t spend energy comparing your date to your ex or even the lady or gentleman across the room for that matter. Remember, no one is perfect and you are on this date for a reason either you initiated it or you agreed.
8. When out to dinner, DON’T order for her. For some reason there has been this long standing ‘myth’ that women like men to order for them well we don’t. Unless you want the food in your lap, just allow her to use her voice. And when she does, keep your ‘comments’ about how she orders, what she orders, etc to yourself. We all have different ideas about the perfect meal.
9. When trying to be adventurous, don’t take your date on an event you absolutely know she hates or is afraid of simply because you want to be the one to ‘teach’ her.
10. If you are into burglary, don’t take her! ( and wonder why she takes off as soon as she got the clue and for goodness sakes, don’t call her to ask her out again)
11. Flirting is fine as long as it is with your date and not the bartender.
12. Finally, don’t take your date to a party that you know your ex is hosting.
Needless to say, the ‘don’t do’ list could go on, but for time sake, I will just leave you with the above. If you have some more additions, I would love to hear them. Please feel free to share by email me [email protected]
Thank you Jenny for doing the interview on what not do to when dating. For more information on Jenny Shaw or her work you can check out her website on www.jennyshawtherapy.com.
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